Tuesday, 8 April 2014

Growing Pains

Pain!  A lot of pain!  This is what I feel when I watch families treat each other like they don’t matter.

Pain, when I see families cut each other off because they don’t all act, speak or think alike.

Pain, when families would rather believe rumors then hear the truth.

Pain, when they spend years apart because of out of place pride killed the love between them.

Pain, as they get older, regret and hurt finally takes over and there’s no clue how to fix it.

Pain, when it’s too late. 

Pain, when no one will allow you to talk to them, no return calls, no birthday calls and worst of all, no Christmas. The cut to the heart when you see a family member somewhere, you wave and they just walk away.  You wonder, ‘what did I do?’  You know deep in your heart you did nothing but be different and you can’t help it nor do you want to.

 Pain, that they don’t know anything about you. The judgment call was made and that was the end of it.

Pain, when the person who was your rock turns away from you for no reason.  

Pain, when your rock moves away from a certain area because people talk too much and lie yet your rock just did it to you.

Pain, when you are adopted to fix a marriage and when you didn’t, you were in the way.

Pain, when you are constantly put down but it’s better than being ignored, so you are grateful for the put downs.

Pain, growing up believing you are stupid because it’s all you heard.

Pain, when you are sent away to private school because it’s easier than having you around.

Pain, because everyone tries to tame your spirit. 

Pain, when a parent remarries and the step-parent doesn’t want you around because you come from another marriage, so you can’t have a relationship with your half-brother and half-sister.

Pain, when your adopted Dad dies and no one tells you for 5 months.

Pain, when your Mother dies, leaves you money but the rest of the family doesn’t feel you deserve it because you are adopted.

Pain, when you grow up and pick a mate who is as cruel to you as your own two families.

Epiphany, when you decide to stop trying with either family because you are just exhausted from their ignorance and cruelties.

Joy, when you get your Private Pilot’s License because now you know you are smart.

Joy, because your travels taught you to communicate with anyone from any walk of life without reserve. 

Joy, for all things different because it makes the world go round. 

Joy, for being able to accept people for who they are.

Joy, for picking and choosing those you now call family.

Joy, for knowing the wisdom of, “believe nothing of what you hear and only half of what you see”.  

Joy, for having the courage to find out the truth in all matters. 

Joy, for being you and no longer trying to fit everyone’s cookie cutter.

Joy, for the written word so you can share with and learn from others.

Euphoric, for loving yourself first and letting your spirit soar!

Copyright © MMXIV Juanita Sullivan.  All Rights Reserved